I'm terribly afraid that the dream would come true la. It's so terrifying. I told the story to maira momma, randal (of course), and told viva that his wish came true(that randal died lol). Freaky dream yes? I don't know why.

It's been raining the whole day. My bus ride back home from hmt was soooo awful. The air-con was turned onto full blast and i was sitting right under it la. I was freezing, but i still had my twiggies to accompany me. Hehehe. During the journey, i could have teared a couple of times. I don't know why but i starting praying for mcdreamy and my loved ones. Is something going to happen to me? Did the dream really affect me? What if it really came true? Also, i thought about ridiculous things that i've been going through. Those horrendous moments in 2006. And no one made me feel better when i came home. HE just didn't acknowledge me. And i didn't... Why would i want to if he doesn't seem glad or happy to see me? I've been confiding in Hafizah for the past few days and like i said, i almost teared in class. You can say Hafizah's jaw practically dropped listening to my words. It's so hurtful that i have to bare with these. It's been quite a long time i would say. Almost 5 years and counting. Should have said more. I remembered the time i didn't leave the toilet in the morning cos' i was busy crying over HIS scoldings (he claimd i was late). My mum dragged me out and questioned me and so on. End up, i went to school myself. I should say i've been a strong girl. I've been finding my own way. With only very little help from her. I remember typing out my Pri 5 misery here as well. The one at the shopping mall. *Sigh, i'm starting to tear again. I always tell myself that i've had enough, that i can only depend on myself now. But what do i have to do to get their attention? I prefer being in school with my friends, where we would laugh at cold jokes and such. I'm always smiling in school. But it's a totally different story when i come back. I've always learnt to appreciate things in front of me. But this time, i don't know if i want to.

Maybe i'm over-sensitive, but i still feel unaccepted. Why? And probably these crying contributed to my loss of weight too. Sheeesssshhh.. Hafizah keep telling me,"Sabah(be patient)." And i shall be till i can't.

Nevertheless, i grabbed a couple more of my favourite TWIGGIES after hmt and this time, took a picture of them to let you have a look (SHAWN! THESE!!)